YIP Index

Babbler's Handbook Ver 4.0

By YIP

Yes, a hyper updated version. Much longer and easier to use than the old guide. It took us long enough to do, so appreciate it or die.

WORDS AND MEANINGS

These are words which have come into popular use within the Babble sub-culture. While we encourage you to make up your own terms and sayings, you are welcome to use these. They may help you understand what is going on. Here is a lengend:

a. - adjective; n. - noun; v. - verb; s. - state of being; o - other.

Absurdism - n. The glorification of the absurd, usually for a philosophical purpose. See Eugene Ionesco, Samuel Beckett, Kurt Vonnegut and Douglas Adams. Also see Babble for debate.

Ainga (ein-gah) - o. 1. An expression of sadness or grief. 2. An integral part of the song "Ainga-Ainga-Moo-Moo" (sung to the tune of "Happy Birthday").

Alexander the Great - n. Hailed by some as the bringer of the word "rekcuf"' to the Eastern world. He also kicked Persian butt, but most feel that this is insignificant in light of his greater achievement.

Allie - n. Pet name for any Greek emperor who took over most of Europe in the 330's (BC).

Anarchy! - n. something someone yells when doing something rebellious, like lightly kicking a post or running in a road devoid of cars.

Babble - nv. 1. A form of expression which is surreally humourous. 2. Babble is a term used by some to describe a form of Absurdist writing. The term is generally frowned upon by Absurdist Artists, since confusion could be made between Babble and Babble, both of which are spelt the same. To the Absurdist, people's biased attitude toward their art form is bad enough. The Absurdist does not wish to be associated with indistinct sounds that are completely void of meaning. 3. "Train of thought" writing or speaking. Some have linked babble to absurdism. They are wrong. Absurdism is an artform which reflects life's futile ridiculousness, and is usually existentialist in nature. Babble has nothing to do with existentialism or absurdism. It is surrealist humour. "Surrealism" is that which finds it's origins in, and appeals to, the subconscious. Babble finds its origins in Emily Dickinson and Plastic Brain Carrier. What a combination. Plastic found Dickinson's work to be quite bizarre. The term "babble" was applied, and then grew from there. See Babble: An Intro (by Milky and Finn) for more.

Bas - n. See Bastard (ie: Ya bas!).

Bastard - n. Term which applies to any human (nothing to do with breeding).

Biftech - n. All-too-popular French meat (see Goat, unrelated, but nice).

Bitter - a. A good thing to be (see Sarcasm).

Bucky - ns. Anyone and everyone (usually, only one person at a time may be Bucky). Also, a frame of mind. A way of existence.

Canada - n. See Erica Ehm.

Cheebah - n. 1. An expression of joy or surprise, when repeated twice (ie. Cheebah cheebah!). Has nothing to do with cannibis, oddly enough. 2. Rapper term for a joint.

Cheeze - n. For some unknown reason, there has been a trend to change the Z in cheeze to an S. The reason for this is unknown, though, personally, I suspect the commies. Some rebels even spell it "Cheexe".

Dica - n. LSD. Oddly enough, experts have linked the word Dica to that of rekcuf (see rekcuf). Some just think its Acid spelt backwards.

Duh-duh! (or Dun-dun!) - o. Term used to dramtically enhance any sort of statement. To be pronounced like the underscore of a bad movie, when a character says something shocking or of great importance to the plot (ie: "What are eating?" "Your little brother!" "Duh-duh!").

Emvy - ?. Fuck, your guess is as good as mine.

Erica Ehm - n. It became quite apparent in the later part of the eighties that to describe Canada accurately, one need only use two words: Erica Ehm. Kind of pointless and stupid, and has more than its own fair share of boobs. It somehow also thinks that it is quite fashionable. The comparison can go on and on.

Face - n. 1. A word to be extremly overused whenever possible. 2. Positive noun (ie. Public Face. Public Enemy is good, hence face). 3. A good neck-covering. 4. For general essence (ie. "I can't give it to you 'cause it's not in my face!")

Fishmonger - n. Any fish or group of fish that Mong. (also see Mong)

Fuck - nvas. So many uses, so little disk space.

Funky - a. Good, nice, correct, wonderful, etc. Funky has it's origins in rapspeak. It originally meant "with lots of bass." Before that: "Smelling bad." Before that: "Good, nice, correct, wonderful, etc." (see: Babylon, where it was originally used).

Gahee - o. A form of laughter.

Geek - n. A Geek is not meant to be an insulting term. It is sometimes misinterpreted as such. A Geek, however, is merely one who uses a Modem. Geeking - v. The act of using a modem. BBSing.

Head - n. 1. Something you bite into, and scream. Human, preferable. 2. Common nesting ground for faces (see Face).

Hey! - o. 1. Popular message summary line (ie: "Hey!"). 2. A term used when one wishes to begin a sentence aesthetically, but does not know how. (ie: "Hey!"). 3. A term used when one wishes to get the attention of another (ie: "Hey!"). 4. General statement of apathy (ie: "Hey!").

Hika - o. See Hou. Can be used with Moo (see Moo).

Hitles - n. Pet name for any German dictator who conquered most of Europe in the 1940's.

Hou - o. All-around action word, to be said while climbing stairs or doing backflips (see Polish Olympic Gymnastics Women's Finals).

Innuendo, Sexual - n. Unhumourous suggestions of sex (see sex) made by the devil's spawn, which acknowledges society's idiotic fear of sex. Can be used as a babble device, if used in a mocking or absurd manner (ie: "Nice wall, eh? ").

Islington Joke - n. (also known as "an Islington" or "Islingtonism") This joke has developed due to a theory that if anything, no matter how unhumourous, is repeated enough, it will get to such a point that the sheer repetition of it will generate humour. The joke is as follows: "How about I meet you at Islington in five minutes?" To which the correct response is "Hmmm... Well, let's see. I would have to get on a bus and then transfer, so it will take me at least five minutes." and then "Hmmm... OK. How about five minutes then?" And so on. I suppose the original humour is that one could not reach Islington in such a short period of time, unless they are very close. But one should ignore this. It is not what is actually said, but how often. To achieve the best effect, the joke should be repeated at least ten times each and every hour. One must realize, before starting, that it won't even appear to be slightly humourous until it has been repeated thirty or so times. One must also treat it seriously at all times, otherwise the effect is lost.

Islington, An - n. A joke of the same genre as the "I'll meet you at Islington in five minutes" joke.

Islingtonism - n. See Islington, An.

Jesus - n. 1. A reference to an obscure biblical school teacher named "Christ" (how absurd, see absurd). Approximately half the world considers him to be devine. Thus, he is great fun to mock (see mock). See Crusifixion.

Julie - n. Pet name for any Roman emporer who conquered most of Europe in the 50's (BC).

k00l - n. A word denoting k00lness, originating in mocking pir8's. Less forms of k00lness include: cool, khul, kool, etc.

La la la - o. Something to say, when there is nothing else to say.

Labia - n. 1. Vaginal lips. 2. A woman, or women in general. 3. A general insult. Many feminist groups have been worried about this. They claim that the only reason that Labia is used as an insult is because of men, and more specifically, men who hate women, somehow got it into their head that insulting the woman's body was a good thing to do. They insist that Labia should only be used when actually describing the vaginal lips. What a bunch of fucking dykes.

Leftists - n. Those long haired hippie freaks you see and just want to stomp the fuck out of.

Mauve - a. A nifty colour (see Actual Mauve and Mogue).

Mock - v. To make light of, to scorn, to imitate satirically. It is a popular belief that the Universe, and everything in it, exists for the enlightened to mock. A popular form of mockery is to point a finger at the mockee, and state: "Ha!" (see Ha!). Mocking is quite fun. Try it some time. Mocker - n. Like mock, but a noun (see Mock).

Mockfest - n. A fest of mockery (See Child's Play II).

Modemspeak - n. 1. One of the many languages babble draws from (ie: warez, d00d, pir8, etc. See k00l). 2. Speaking like a modem (ie: khkhkhkh).

Mogue - a. A colour. Has its origin in Finn attempting to pronounce "Mauve". Has since evolved into it's own special colour, which, coincidentally, is like Mauve. Exactly, in fact (see Mauve, unless, of course, you've just come from Mauve).

Mong - v. Something a fish can do by himself or with a few friends (See Fishmonger).

Moo - o. 1. All purpose word. It works well in conjunction with Ainga. (ie: Ainga moo). Moo has surpassed Ainga in popularity. 2. Ancient cow proverb.

Moonya - n. An insult, its origin is unknown.

Mother, Your - n. This term found its original use as a reply to the question: "What are you doing?" or any deviation of said question ("What are you doing tonight? What were you doing last month?", etc). The term then evolved (if such a word can be used) into a generic response. It was found that the term could be used as a reply to just about anything, although often a modification must be implemented.

Muthahfuckah - n. An all-purpose noun (nothing to do with incest, but see incest anyway, just for fun).

Napoleon - n. A form of ice cream that took over the world at the beginning of the nineteenth century (see Nappie, should be easy enough to find, bastard).

Nappie - n. Pet name for any French emperor who conquered most of Europe in the early 1800's.

Nazi - n. Any bad or mean person (nothing to do with National Socialism).

Neo-Ostrogothism - n. A philosophy, created by Totenbuch Christ, which finds it's basis in the concept of mockery (see mock).

New Math - n. A new, simplified version of mathematics, it replaces all the complicated rules of calculus, algebra, etc. with a simple, universal and unifying rule: x=3 (ie: A right threaded bolt is tightened by applying a 50 N force to a 0.2 m wrench. Find the moment of force about the bolt. Solution: Let x be the moment of force. Calculations: x=3 Conclusion: Therefore, the moment of force about the bolt is 3).

Nice - a. Generic excuse (ie: "You racist!" "No, I'm nice." "Oh.")

Odd - a. The babblistically correct term for that which is unusual or absurd in nature (ie: everything, see everything).

Pi - n. 1. Discovered by the ancient Greeks, pi is a pretty neat number. The words "three-point-one-four" seem to roll off the tongue like melted butter. The word "pi" is very easy to use in puns (ie: "A slice of 3.14?") and is often used as an Islingtonism (see, y'know) in page numbering and the like. The fact that it paradoxically describes an infinitely long number in two letters (or one, if you are Greek) endears it to babblers and absurdists. 2. The first two letters in Pickering. Coincidence? I think not.

Pick-a-go - n. The GO train station in Pickering. Can be used in conjuction with any city with a GO station (ie: Ajax-a-go, Miss-a-go, etc.)

Pickerhead - n. One who lives within the boundaries of Pickering. A general insult used towards someone who lives in Pickering. Such as: "Stupid Pickerhead."

Pudding - n. A gooey, somewhat absurd substance. Tapioca, preferably.

Pun - n. 1. Any form of humour which is not funny. 2. Anything which is not serious (ie: "You said you would pay me on Friday." "That was a pun.")

Quaint - as. Some would have you believe "old-fashioned". LIES! A state of ultimate and divine goodness (see k00l).

Racist - na. Any person who generalizes or points out the characteristics of any person or object (ie: "That wall is black." "You racist!").

Rapspeak - n. One of many languages which babble has drawn from. The language of rappers (see Cheebah and Funky).

Rekcuf - na. A general insult. Some experts have traced its meaning to the dawn of civilization. Noting that Alexander the Great brought the word with him as he first conquered Persia, and then India. The Vikings brought it to the new world, and attempted to give it to some Indians. Columbus had a better go at it. Others have noted that its merely Fucker spelt backwards and thus chuckle at these so called experts.

Rekcufs - n. Get one rekcuf, add one or more, and stir.

Risque (Risk-eh) - a. The use of initials (ie: JC for Jesus Christ).

Sarcasm - a. A good thing to say (see Bitter).

Saturday - n. A day when we do not go to school, and thus can be used to be uproarously humourous (ie: "Isn't that assignment due tommorow?" "Tommorow's Saturday!" At which point the jokee, and anyone standing within hearing range, will break into loud, jubilent laughter). This has its origins in the mockery of people who find humour in such simple matters.

Sex - n. Read also: Masturbation, Homosexuality, Penis size, Women, etc. etc. See Innuendo, Sexual. Can be good if used paradoxically (ie: "Gee, I have a really small penis." "Gee, I am gay." etc.)

Spamheads - n. Certain people believe that they are conquering the world.

Speaker's Corner - n. A religious shrine which Milky, Finn and Totenbuch visit once a month to leave two minutes of wit which have no hope of ever getting on television, as they are neither sappy nor typical.

Spearchucker - n. Immensely ridiculous insult (see Moonya).

Spleen - n. 1. A neat internal organ. Considered by some to be ornamental, but you'll never see it on a Christmas tree. 2. What the human race is made to encase, pettily, besides.

Stickerhead - n. The term Stickerhead is not an easy one to describe. It has so many meanings to so many people (well, perhaps not so many people). Some have felt the desire to stand outside a donut shop and yell "Hey Stickerhead." These people are generally anti-Stickerhead. Stickerheadom has something to do with getting a sticker and placing it on the side of one's head, hence the name.

Tongue - n. 1. What comes out of hiding when you die. 2. Face parasites.

Turquoise - n. A neat name for a colour, I like it. Rumoured to be the shade in between blue and green, but more likely Mauve (see Mauve, yes, again).

Wallpaper - n. Stuff you put on walls, if you are ashamed of them.

Waffenpickerheadpudding - n. See Waffenpudding, abb. WPHP.

Waffenpudding - n. A babble musical group.

Weekend Package - n. The successful predescessor to the YIP magazine, begun in BC, circa 1985. Herein, babble evolved.

World War I - n. See Dental Floss As A Weapon Of War.

World War II - n. A lot of boots marched all over Poland. Then they marched over France and other various countries. More boots. Lots of Tanks. Lots of marching back and forward. And so on (See Dental Floss And The Versailles Treaty).

Y'know - avns. 1. Y'know. 2. A substite for any word in any language. 3. See YIP.

YIP - nvaos. 1. Fuck off, if I have to explain it to you, then there is no point. 2. Well, OK. Y'know Inc. Productions. A group of people who participate in the act of babbling together. 3. A group which cherishes oddity (same as above, see oddity). 4. A magazine which brings the wonders of babble and absurism to the world. 5. Your mother (see Mother, Your).

PHRASES

These are things we say that are slightly longer then words:

How odd - Something to say when something odd happens, or not.

I'm so sure - Very cynical comment.

Oh well - A somewhat apathetic expression of sorrow. (ie: "My arm has fallen off. Oh well.")

Oh, you're ... - Generic reply (ie: "This pen is all sticky." "Oh, you're all sticky.").

Nice hat - A term used to cheer someone up, instantly. Existence of hat not mandatory.

Surely you jest - Reply to "Touche." (See Touche)

Touche - Reply to "Surely you jest." (See Surely you jest)

There was an accident at the clinic - An all-purpose excuse (ie: "Why didn't you do your homework?" "There was an accident at the clinic." "Oh.")

You would - Reply to any statement of action (ie: "I am going to the store." "You would.")

BABBLE ANIMALS

Babble culture is largely based on an intense love of animals, here are some you should think about:

Aardvark - Animal at the beginning of a dictionary (see the Aardvark collection).

Armadillo - Always in demand by street beggars (see The Far Side comic on Finn's wall by Gary Larson).

Cat - Incredibly evil demons in a furry shell (see Monty Python and the Holy Grail).

Cow - Inventors of the word Moo. God and Lord of all animals (see Cow by Frets, Compendium of Cow Poetry by Milky and Cow Lore by Maelstrom).

Chickens - Future oppressors of humanity (see When Chickens Get the Vote by Totenbuch Christ).

Cjickens - An Israeli chicken (with a "j"). Has its origins in a spelling error by Creeping Face.

Dog - Don't worry, all dogs are fake.

Duck - They quack, Llama haters. A small anti-Llama rebel force consisting of YIP members Death Warden, Gambit and the bastard leader, El Del, chose the spawn Satan ducks as their animal of choice. This is an unbiased account (see: Totenbuch's philosophy of life, Go Llamas, go!).

Fish - Underwater pig, Giglio (YIP Mascot) is a fish (see The Fishman or any message by the Necromancer).

Fuish - There are some in Greenland, but there are none here. Has its origins in Creeping Face's attempt at spelling "Fish" in his History of the World.

Goat - 1. A three legged horned beast from the lower end of the Alpine mountains. It is well known for its tendency to devour entire continents. Do not say, "Hey, could you take care of my goat for a while," to anyone who claims (correctly or falsely) to come from Atlantis. 2. An animal which everything is like, but different.

Iguana - Nifty lizard.

Llama - South american beast of burden, rulers of the Babylonian animal kingdom (see Encyclopedia Llamatica by Frets).

Mongoose - Old fashioned Babble animal. Snake, I believe. Hiss.

Wombat - See above, if you want to, of course. But it's not a snake, more like a bear.

Yak - Buffalo-like inhabitants of Nepal (see Yaks by Milky).

BABBLE COUNTRIES

The following are nations united by their Babblish qualities. Here is a legend:

f. - Former Earth Country; e. - Earth Country; n. - Neo-Babylonian Country.

Babylon - f. 1. Babylon is the mythical origin of YIPism. No one really believes this complete lie. No one cares. 2. The origin of YIPism.

Cjickens Anyone? - n. Friend of Duckville.

Duckada - n. Neo-Babylonian nation populated mainly by ducks and other birds. The main religion is Duckism, the capital is Duckville. How creative.

Finland - e. Most people don't realize Finland was an Axis power in WWII. This is because it was pathetic (see Monty Python).

Face - n. Powerful country in Neo-Babylonia which is terrorized by a gang called the Cheebah Warriors.

Guatemala - e. You will find it south of Mexico.

Holland - f. Holland current exists under the names The Netherlands, Belgium and Luxembourg. But they are all Hollish and Holland shall return.

Hyperbolia - n. You've heard of Hyperbolas? This is where they live. Contains the large Neo-Babylonian cities of Hyper, Bolia and Biftech.

Llamaland - n. The largest country in Neo-Babylonia. Formerly the Llamish Empire, which contained most of Neo-Babylonia.

MegaPudding - n. Settled by exiles from Biftech.

Mongolia - e. See Asia.

Neo-Babylonia - n. A planet. Half is frozen, half is normal Earth temperature. May or may not have had contact with Earth.

New Guatamala - n. Contains the districts of New Holland, New Yugoslavia, New Prussia, New Mongolia, New Guatemala, New Nepal, etc.

Nethroxia - n. The most Earth-like of the Neo-Babylonian nations.

Prussia - f. Once the brightest star among military empires, now a mere component of Germany and Poland. It will be free!

Solenmarcel - n. The merger of Sol and Marcel created this northernmost Neo-Babylonian republic, the only N-Bian nation on both sides of the River Slazik.

VERY Dense Fog - n. No-one has ever seen it.

Well I'd Like A Moonya Sandwich But I just Don't Have Any Patience - n. Commonly known as Wilems Bidjhap. Ruled by King Let-Go-Of-My-Ankle 5.

Yaktika - n. Satellite of Llamaland.

Yugoslavia - e. The original cow homeland. Currently at war with itself, and quite likely to lose.

CREDITS

This guide prepared by Golden Rodent, Milky Puppy, The Finn and Totenbuch Christ with much thanks to all babblers and YIP members.

YIP Index