This jam was real emotional. I remember once, I just looked at it funny, and it started crying. Not just jam whimpering, but real human tears. Our children were the same way.
Jim had a nasty little virus.
It attacked him viciously. First all his skin turned into wood and then a huge basketball hoop grew where his chin had once been. Soon after, he turned into a waterwheel, and then every Tuesday he would become a wild horse-dolphin. When the moon was full, which was often back then, he would give birth to thousands and thousands of little hampsters, all of whom would assail anyone they felt to be too strongly religious. 'Fanatical' was the term they used.
Jim ate something maroon and got all better.
Ah, the harvest. When all the wheat and corn are gathered up and brought home and eaten.