Fun Depot





Diary of a Man Who Solders His Penis to a Wall
by Plastic Brain Carrier

Oct 19/93: THAT'S IT I decided and soldered my penis to the wall. That's the last time it would bother me. It's ruled my life for just too damn long.

Oct 20: I'm feeling quite sore because I can't go to the bathroom. I soldered my penis hole shut. I suppose I should have thought about urinating. I'm also thirsty and hungry. Oh well...

Oct 21: I'm now very hungry and my throat is quite dry. My dog has died of dehydration and I fear I will be next.

Oct 22: I've chewed off my left arm to stay alive. It's the first nourishment I've had in days. I've found a way to urinate by poking a hole in the shaft of my penis out of which the urine my flow. I did it with this pen.

Oct 23: After 4 days of sleeping standing up, my legs are very tired. i will eat my right arm. Can't write. Bye.